One of the most important things for autism families to learn is that self-care is not selfish. This can be challenging to understand as well as implement though.
Parents and siblings believe they must always be there to help their autistic loved one and to be their voice. Part of taking care of your family is teaching them how to take care of themselves.
There is a reason airlines tell you to put your oxygen mask on first. You can’t help someone else if you need help yourself. This is especially important in an autism household.
You need to embrace self-care to reduce stress and ensure you have all the energy and tools at your disposal to deliver the best support possible. It doesn’t apply to one family member, but everyone, so make sure everyone knows how important self care is to daily life.
Self Care Ideas For The Whole Family
The Power of The Nap
Naps are typically reserved for pets, college students, and babies. Never underestimate how effective a nap can be when you feel overwhelmed at home. A power nap is recognized as an exceptional self-care method for a reason. Sometimes it’s just what the doctor ordered.
Not everyone is capable of a power nap. Michael can nap for five minutes and be refreshed. Once I fall asleep, I won’t wake up again until the sun has set. This can affect your sleep schedule if you sleep too long.
Since I am a night owl, it makes sense for me to nap during the day for an hour or so. It helps me to nap then do something physical like housework or make dinner.
Don’t force yourself to nap or beat yourself up if you are not a power napper. If you’re getting adequate sleep at night then a nap isn’t required. It’s a self help idea not requirement. Follow the sleep schedule that works for you.
Get Out the House
Take a walk around the block. Go to the park. It doesn’t matter what you do, just do it outside.
Sit in the backyard if that’s all you can do. The fresh air and vitamin D will do everyone good.
We try to talk a family walk in the evenings if we can. It helps everyone get out of the house, slow down, and spend time together. Is it everyday? No. Is it as often as we can? Yes.
Take a Soak in the Tub
There are few things better than taking a long, relaxing soak in the tub. There is something about being in the steaming water surrounded by bubbles that makes you feel at ease, no matter what is going on in your life.
Remind your family that this is your time, so they shouldn’t disturb you.
This may or may not work in your household. I can remind my family until I’m blue in the face but someone always needs something from me while in the bath. Don’t feel bad if this scenario is not a reality for you.
Play Music
Music can help calm your nerves. These could be songs that remind you of simpler times, while classical music can also offer calming effects. The beauty of this self-care approach is that you can do it even when you feel stressed.
If you have a Bluetooth speaker in the house, simply play your playlist and let the music guide you towards tranquility. It won’t just benefit you, but also everyone else in the house. I like to put on praise and worship when everyone is on edge. It helps calm me and them.
Catch Up On Your Reading
Even if you used to be an avid reader, there’s a strong possibility that you have fallen behind ever since autism entered your world. Work, responsibilities, and autism simply make it too difficult to sit down and focus on the pages for long periods of time.
Audiobooks are the answer. I can throw on an audiobook while making dinner. If Logan’s at therapy, I will put on my noise canceling headphones to listen to an audiobook while I watch. Yes, I’m the mom who doesn’t let her child go back with a therapist without me. Logan’s safety is my number one priority.
You may not want to dive deep into literary fiction or complicated theory, but an easy read (especially one that’s a guilty pleasure), can transport you somewhere else for a while, allowing you to recharge and refresh yourself.
Get a Massage
Some people love massages, some people do not. If you’re the former, you know how effective a deep tissue massage can be to reduce stress. It’s not always so easy to go out and get a massage, though, especially with all the other responsibilities on your plate. It’s not like you can call any old babysitter either.
If you can get a way to get a massage, then do it. If not, don’t feel bad or give it another thought.
Engage With Your Support System
Your tribe is there for a reason. Use them to listen to you rant and help reduce stress and look after yourself. There is no use bottling up every frustration or feeling. It will not turn out well. Believe me on this one.
Friendly reminder to vent only with those you trust. Not everyone deserves a seat at your table. If they haven’t walked in your shoes, keep your problems to yourself.
Sit Down And Breathe
While you can search high and low for the secret to self-care, it can be something as straightforward as sitting down and breathing that can be the most beneficial.
This is a popular option as it doesn’t require any serious disruption to your life, especially if you have significant care responsibilities. You can locate small nuggets of time throughout the day to stop, sit, and breathe.
As little as five minutes can do wonders for you and it will decrease your stress levels while also giving you time to think. With this, you can solve problems or simply let your mind wander, whatever works best for you.
If minutes are not possible, look for a few seconds here and there to take a breath. My Apple watch will often tell me to take a breath when my heart rate gets too high. I will duck into our front coat closet to calm myself and restore my breathing. It helps that my chocolate stash is in there too.
Autism families know how stressful each day can be. It is impossible to provide constant support without also supporting yourself. Do not feel guilty about looking after yourself. Part of taking care of your family is teaching them to take care of themselves. Self care for families is essential.
