The dark side of autism can overwhelm your family if you allow it. You have to make creating a happy home a priority every single day. Everyone wants to come home to a happy place.
We have a responsibility to ourselves and our family to create a home where everyone feels safe and loved. A nurturing home, where we feel respected and appreciated by our loved ones, makes every aspect of our lives easier and happier regardless of autism.
Easy Ways To Create A Happy Home
Give your family transition time
It’s nice to be greeted at the door with a hug and a kiss, but afterwards, most people usually need a little bit of time to unwind from work, school or therapy appointments. It takes time to transition their minds to being home with family. We all need a few minutes to switch gears.
I always allow Logan to have quiet time in his room when we return from appointments, therapy, or outings. It helps him to reset and reboot. To be honest, it helps all of us.
Make it as easy and stress-free as possible for your family. Maybe just 5-10 minutes of quiet time to catch their breath and change their clothes is all they need. Then they are in a better place, mentally, to sit down and truly enjoy family time.
Make down time a requirement
Our lives are chaotic and stressful, which impacts everyone’s overall health and well-being. Time to relax tends to be thought of as a luxury. But it really needs to be a priority that should be planned into everyone’s day or at least, week. It is important that everyone enjoy a little downtime, either individually or as a family.
- Arts and crafts
- Cooking or baking
- Sports or outdoor activities
- Watching movies
- Reading
Figure out what your family really enjoys doing to relax and plan some time to do it together. The key here is to find something that your child with autism likes to do and feels competent. Now is not the time to teach a new skill or play a new game. Now is the time to use things that have previously worked with your child.
Schedule down time just like you would a therapy appointment or other non negotiable appointment. If you indeed want a happy family, you will be sure down time for everyone happens on a regular basis.
Laugh
Doctors agree that laughter is one of the best ways to relieve stress. Surprisingly, it also helps to prevent illness. And it’s a great way to connect with your family. Families who laugh together build a stronger connection and bond to each other. Laughter is a sure sign of a happy home.
Share memories of fun vacations, tell kids about some of the silly things they did as babies, or ask your family to share some of the funny moments of their day. Do not make it compulsory for your child to participate . As they want to be with you , they will participate more and more.
We keep a running journal of funny things one of us has said here in Autismland. When someone is grumpy, we remind ourselves of a happy occasion to make us all laugh away the grumpies.
Need to work through some issues in your family before all of this can take place? Family therapy can be a great option that helps you achieve your goal in the long run. You can even do it all online these days which should help everyone open up more since they are in a comfortable environment. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if your family needs it.
Prioritize Your Health As Parents
As a parent to an autistic child, your entire world revolves around their health and their needs. Forgetting to look after yourself is very common, however you need to put your health first. Don’t forget to attend regular check ups with your doctor, optician and dentist.
Although you always have a lot on your plate, these appointments will ensure that you are always feeling fit and healthy. For example, you may not even realize that you need progressive lenses if you don’t go and see your optician every year or so. Don’t ask me how I know this. Can anyone say cataracts?
Make it a priority to attend these regular check ups. Putting your own self care at the top of your list will help you live longer to take care of your child. Every autism parent fears what will happen to their autistic child when they die. Help yourself live as long as possible. Part of taking care of your child and family is taking care of yourself.
